Monday, February 21, 2011

Better

“I did then what I knew how to do. 
Now that I know better, I do better.”
                                                                                  - Maya Angelou

Life is a series of moments, all lined up like pearls on a strand. Each is beautiful and unique and fragile on its own, but when they're put together they form something greater as a whole. In each of these individual moments, we make choices. Some are big and some are small, but most of us make the best possible choices we can in those moments. Given our circumstances, our resources, our life experiences, our states of mind, we do the very best we can at the time. Sometimes things turn out well, but sometimes the results are disastrous. Hopefully we learn, so that in the next moment we do better.

All of this sounds great, but my problem is always perspective. I always forget that I will have more moments, that in all likelihood, no matter how awful my choices and no matter how terrible the consequences, there will be another moment. There will be another chance to pick myself up, dust myself off, and do a little better. This moment is one of many, and it doesn't define my life as a whole. It doesn't even necessarily influence my life from now on. But what will influence the rest of my moments is what I learn from this one. 

Today, I learned that no matter how sincere or accommodating or truly wonderful I am, I cannot make someone else love me. The only person I can make love me is me, and that is what I need to do first.

Tomorrow, I will do better.

2 comments:

The Plush Gourmet said...

Still learning that one....maybe we all are in some sense. It's hard to do in this age of Perfect Everything, if you know what I mean by that. Perfect appearance, perfect career - the expectations we set for ourselves seem so high. Loving me is very hard most days - it's much easier to pick at me in the voice of some past critic.

Katherine said...

Beautiful and true.

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